11-18-2013

Eli Holt McLane

11/18/2013
8 lbs. 3 oz.
20 inches
Born at 9:55 am

(For records sake, who knows when I'll get a chance to write this down in my actual journal. Skip to the pictures if your not up for a lot of reading)

My plans for the day were to shop for Chad's birthday. My plans were changed....

I woke up around 6:00 am because of course I was super uncomfortable. I was on the couch, I got up to pee and then lied back down. I felt a little pop from inside of me and I remembered hearing that could mean my water broke. I panicked for about 2 seconds and then got up to go to the bathroom. Nothing came out so I wrote it off and decided to just get up for good. It was 6:30am when I felt a pretty good contraction but not much more painful than the contractions I'd been having for weeks before.  We had planned on taking the kids to school but Carly was already out of bed and 5 minutes later Sam popped out of his room all dressed and ready to go (which never happens!) We figured since they're all ready they'd be able to ride the bus. I kept getting contractions but they were sporadic. Some would be 2 minutes apart and others would be 5. They were still manageable. I still made lunch for the kids. I just paused when a contraction came and then finished what I was doing when it ended. The kids got on the bus at 7:30am.  Chad called his mom (not sure exactly what time whether before the kids left or after) Annie was still in bed so I got dressed.  This whole time I was having contractions but I wasn't too worried because in my mind I thought they would be so painful. Chad's mom showed up to our house in record time. (A HUGE shout out to my Mother-in-law.  She was such a great help Monday and Tuesday.  I knew my other kids were in great hands and I didn't have to worry once! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!) I was still debating on whether or not it was the right time to head to the hospital.  Once his mom showed I actually went about 10 minutes with no contractions so that really had me questioning. I didn't want it to be a false alarm. Then, i had once contraction that had me worried and within minutes Chad and I were off to the hospital and Annie was helping Mimi feed the cows. Once in the car my contraction really sped up coming every 3 minutes (roughly) They were definitely more intense and at one point I felt like he was going to push his way out!  

Of course, it was a Monday morning so of course there was lovely traffic.  Luckily my husband had guts (or he was super nervous) he flipped on the emergency lights and rode in the emergency lane. The whole time there I was breathing through contractions, trying to relax in between, praying that everything would turn out ok.  WE pulled up to the hospital doors and I sat up to get out and Voila! my water broke. It wasn't a gush but it definitely was my water.  Chad got me a wheelchair and wheeled me in.  Once in the exam room they wanted me to change into a gown when all of a sudden the floor was wet.  My water had officially broken.  It was just lovely. Almost immediately the contractions got super intense. They checked me to see how far along I was. I was honestly expecting to be dilated to a 5 but no....I heard the numbers 8-9 and I was in shock!! They immediately wheeled me out into the delivery room.  I don't remember much other than I was getting super annoyed with some of the nurses. They were super nice and helpful but they kept asking me questions for their stupid paperwork. All I kept thinking was "HELLO! I'm having a baby here!"  They kept going back and forth about if it was too late for an epidural. I figure they were just trying to find a nice way to say it was too late.  I finally told them if I was going to be ready to deliver soon then I'd go without one. So, they scratched the epidural idea.  I couldn't believe it myself. Was I really going to do this?  Could I do this? I admit, throughout this whole pregnancy I toyed with the idea of epidural free. I read up on the hypnobirthing and the whole time I kept telling myself that I could do it. So, deep down inside I was hoping for this exact scenario. That I would arrive too late for an epidural, I know that I'm not strong enough to turn one down unless I had no choice. 

Anyway....After about an hour of labor (seemed like eternity!) And a lot of arguing with the nurses, telling them I had to push, that I basically couldn't stop my body from pushing my doctor walked in and said it was time to have the baby.  I was so relieved and yet scared at the same time. I tried to not be scared because I knew that would make the pain worse.  To spare you details (I'll save those for my actual journal) Let's just say that I don't think Chad has ever heard  me scream so loud since he's known me. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever heard myself scream so loud. 

Everything was such a blur, I honestly don't remember much of the seconds after he was born. All I remember was laying there, staring at the ceiling, catching my breath and thinking "Did I really just do this?" 

I was able to having skin to skin time with him for over an hour before he was measured and weighed and all of that stuff. I loved it! I also loved the fact that I wasn't numb. I could move my legs, I could get up and get cleaned off and hour after having him.  THAT was nice! 

This next part may be TMI for some of you.  After I got up out of bed and cleaned up, clean sheets on the bed I was able to get back in bed to relax and enjoy the moment. Almost immediately I was hit a contraction. I remember after birth contraction but they were nothing like this. We joked that there was a twin in there.  About 3 minutes later I was hit with another. I got super nauseous and very lightheaded, I felt like I was going to faint. I told Chad to go get someone. The nurse came in and immediately I saw the look on her face and new something was not ok.  Everything again was a huge blur.  I remember them rushing get an IV in. Someone gave me a shot in my leg and another nurse was pushing on my stomach. All the while I was trying not to faint or puke.  I sort of just zoned out. Chad later said I was so pale. My blood pressure dropped to 58/32, my pulse was 47.  I'll spare some graphic details but basically I had postpartum hemorrhage.  I honestly felt like death. It scared me so bad and I think I'm still recovering from the shock of natural childbirth and the emotions of having that complication. I know it could have been much worse. I am just so grateful I had people around me who worked so hard to take care of me. Poor Chad, saw things that I'm pretty sure he wishes he could forget. 

Anyway, I am so unbelievably grateful this little guy is here (and two days early!)  It still took us a couple hours to decide that Eli would be his first name. It took until an hour before we left for home to decide Holt for his middle name.

Now, for some pictures....

Eli's first day home. Carly wanted to take our picture.

 Proud Big brother

 Picture in the hospital

 another hospital picture

 Typical Carly picture

 Love yawning babies!

Annie was enjoying my bed that moved up and down.

 Annie checking out baby brother

 My life!

 I took this picture at 39 weeks.  The morning of delivery was way to chaotic. I totally spaced a before picture, oh well! Can't (won't) put him back.

One of the good moments of my day!

Pumpkin Painting

I'm not a huge Halloween fan, I'll be the first to admit that. I really would be ok skipping right over Halloween and into Thanksgiving but....with kids that's just not possible.

Instead of carving pumpkins (which again, not my favorite thing) we opted for painting pumpkins and the kids were just as happy, if not happier.  They each took their time to create their masterpiece. Annie painted a little here and a  little there and mostly covered her body (which she did not like so much) She can't stand to have dirty hands.  Once the kids were done we decided it was time to paint my pumpkin.  I've never been pregnant (I take that back, HUGE pregnant) so close to Halloween.  At first they thought it was weird to be painting me but they soon got over that and went to town and did a great job!

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We have been finally getting some rain around here. A little late for our hay fields but it is appreciated non the less.  Annie loves to be outside and rain definitely did not stop her.  She loved running (and sometimes falling, darn boots) around in the puddles and rain.  She of course was sad when it was time to go in. 

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After three years of staring at the hideous colors in our bedroom(red walls with yellow beadboard?? no thanks!) I like red and yellow together just not on huge walls! We finally decided it was time to paint, now we are wondering why we waited so long!! It's amazing what fresh paint and a little bit of furniture rearrangement can do!

Now the hard/fun part, decorating.  That will probably have to wait till after baby (which by the way, will take over our room in a matter of weeks!)

This last picture is of the little room just off to the side of our bedroom.  We figured we'd freshen it up as well and get rid of the dark wood paneling. It definitely brightened up the room!

35 weeks

Not much has been going on around here, thus my lack of posts. Yesterday was Columbus day so the kids were out of school. I caught this moment last night and I just had to get a picture. It doesn't happen very often where all of my kids are sitting still, even with a movie going. 

Every now and then I'll catch Annie sitting by her bucket of books flipping through the pages. I love it so much! She loves books!

35 weeks!!

I can't believe I'm here at this point. I am definitely feeling pregnant, night and day.  

Sleep doesn't come easy and it doesn't last long. It takes forever to fall asleep and then it seems like I wake up constantly throughout the night. 

This child loves to move in the evening. It can be quite painful and when he kicks sometimes it'll make my whole body move. 

Heartburn is off and on. It usually hits me the second I wake up and then fades throughout the day.

Still no name for this little guy. I'm still not to worried, I'm sure something will come up.

I'm really really hoping I'll have this baby early, not too early, just a couple days, that's all I'm asking.

I'm getting limited on maternity clothes that still fit me well. 

 I spend most of my days chasing after Annie and trying to keep up with cleaning my house. But it seems like with just that I get way exhausted. 

I just can't wait for this little one to make his debut. 

30 weeks!

I've made it. The final stretch! (literally) It seems like it's taken forever to get to this point but again, like everything else in life I will blink and it will be over. 

*I've been feeling pretty decent most of the time. I have really been going through the nesting phase.  Some days are worse than others. I am getting a lot done which I am glad about but it seems like I'm never satisfied with the way my house is organized. 

*I have heartburn pretty much 24/7. It doesn't matter what kind of food I eat. 

*Baby boy likes to move but I'm okay with that, even when I get jabbed in places that don't feel so great. It helps me know that he's OK.

*Still don't have a name for this little dude. I'm not stressed about it though. 

*I can't stand for long periods of time or I feel like my legs will give out on me.

*I have all the baby clothes ready and put away. I've had to use major self control at times when walking by the baby section at Target. Curse Target for selling such adorable baby clothes!

*Sleeping at night is 50/50. One night I'll sleep great and the next night I'll toss and turn.

*I haven't had much of an appetite lately, I think the hot weather mixed with the lack of stomach space is the reason.

*I'm just really ready for this baby boy to be here. Not so sure how Annie will deal with it, I'm kind of nervous about that. She's my partner during the day for the next two months, it'll be a shock when we throw a new baby into the mix. Unfortunately she has already been reverting back to her "waahhh-nnie" stage which is throwing me for a loop. But, like everything, we will get through this phase and onto the next. 

The end of summer has come. All in all it was a great summer, lots of memories were made, and lots of fun was had.  We spent the last week of summer taking it easy and getting ready for school. Carly had a great idea to make her own Repunzel hair.  It was quite clever.  

Another game of Uno. This game was a huge hit! The kids love it and would play it every night if we let them.  

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First day of school

August 26, 2013

Sam

Kindergarten

He was so excited! Right before we left for school I could sense a little bit of nervousness. He got really cuddly with me.  Taking him to class was bitter/sweet for me.  He's been my sidekick the past two years Carly has been in school.  It was weird dropping off my little man.  He got straight to work coloring the picture on his desk.  I hope and pray that he has a good day!

Carly

2nd Grade

I can't believe she's in 2nd grade!! She was SUPER excited to go back to school. She really couldn't contain her excitement.  She loves school and everything about it. I know she'll have a great day!

Lately

I've been lazy with the whole blog thing lately. Maybe its because of Summer, or I'm pregnant or I've just had nothing to exciting to blog about. I figured I should write about something, anything.

 Here's my belly at 26 weeks. 

I'm feeling pretty darn good. 

*I even had enough motivation and energy to repaint our master bathroom while Chad was out of town.

*Sleeping is not so great. I'm dead tired during the day but of course bedtime comes and I'm wide awake. I also end up waking up super early. 

*I crave these yummy, pretty healthy chocolate muffins I found on pinterest. I could make and eat them everyday. I also am loving tomato, avacado, cucumber and Italian Dressing for lunch. oh yeah, and a bowl of ice cream in the evening. ;)

*It's hard to bend over and pick things up so I usually have Sam or Carly pick things up for me.

*I have a really weird dry patch of skin on the top of my right hand, not sure if its pregnancy related.

*It's super HOT here, we don't go outside much.

*We went to the lake on Saturday and it felt so good to swim.

*We still haven't decided on a name. We really haven't discussed it much. I actually don't mind waiting till we have him to give him a name. He is "baby boy" right now.

*Carly wants to name him Buddy. As in "Buddy the Elf"

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I was cooking dinner yesterday and had my usual helper. I thought it might be a good idea to take pictures, after all, I don't have enough pictures of this little cutie ;)

eating snacks while I cook

 Begging for more to drink, while I try to cook.

 getting into our "lovely" curtains. (the people in this house before us obviously didn't have small children)

 Pulling the rags off my stove for the one billionth time

 putting the rag over her head while she tries to walk around (she had walked into cabinets and walls too many times to count.)

 The aftermath of the tent in Carly's room. (we needed the kitchen chairs back)  Carly and Sam have spent many hours keeping busy in her room this summer.

 Annie and Sam playing together

 Carly, trying to clip her own toenails

and last but not least, Sam throwing soft balls at Annie while she runs away screaming (happily)

These are the days for sure.  I am trying to soak in every minute and be grateful for every minute, every mess that is made, every fight I have to break up, every tear I have to wipe, every diaper I have to change. It all goes by way to quick and I just don't like it.  Before I know it I'll be sending this sweet little "baby boy" off to school and it breaks my heart.  I look forward to the future, I look forward to no more potty training, no more diapers, no more late night awakenings but......I will miss my life as I know it right now in this moment.